Miss independent, the mom who also wears the pants in the household! She who has no choice but to play daddy to her child or children, in most instances, is much like Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde.
On the phone one hand, this woman is nurturing, sensitive, the kisser of all those little boo-boos and the homemaker! On the other hand, this woman is the bread winner, the head of the household, he no-shit taker and the one who has to teach her son how to be a man, a better man then his sperm donner whose mastered the art of disappearing.
This lady has to be strong at heart because, any sign of weakness will give her child or children, the ammunition to gun her down and take over the thrown because as we all know, to be a woman means, to be a queen but what men fail to realize, is that when they relinquish their title as king, the queen now has double the power she already had in the first place and once a WOMAN has had a taste of complete power in her home, it's going to be hard for her to give that up.
Note to men: When y'all get women pregnant, you guys are the only ones who are capable if leaving the situation. If a woman were to leave, they'd be judged, hearing things such as, what kind of mother just leaves their child? Or what was she thinking? She must be crazy! But if a man leaves, people give all kinds of excuses like, maybe he wasn't ready! Or maybe he was scared! My question is, what kind of bullshit us that? I mean can a woman not be scared? Can she not be ready? So why isn't she justified in walking out but a man is!?
I, much like many of you readers, was raised by a single mother. She carried all of the weight and worked her ass off ( almost all of the time) trying to provide for us, us being me and my three siblings, the best way she knew how and we appreciated her for that. Showering her with double everything, especially love but we, as little girls, don't really appreciate our single mothers, until we become ones our selves and then, it's as if we see just how much our own mothers struggled.
Throughout your life of course there are struggles...Financial, mental and emotional but, that struggle is vastly doubled when you have a child. I wonder if a man has ever tried to consider our struggle and if so, did he just not give a damn because he was FREE!
Lets, for a minute, discuss the job description of a homemaker/ single mother...A typical week includes; waking up, getting the kids feed and bathed. Doing your daughters hair or going to get your sons hair cut. Sending them off to school - daycare or headstart, of course you'll have to wash your own ass and get yourself ready for the day. Then you'll head off to work - to make the money. At some point you'll have to go to the grocery store ( if you qualify for foodstamps, BONUS! ) If your job is working from home ( stay - at - home parent ) then you'll have to get your hustle on just to make/ get your money. Then it's time to clean house i.e, washing dishes and clothes, taking out the trash and cleaning that out, mowing the lawn on the weekend and damn if your car needs to be fixed. By the time you get a chance to sit down, its time to pick up the kids, do homework, start dinner, get the kids ready for school in the morning and yourself for the new day and then off to bed, only to get up and do it all over again, ALL BY YOURSELF.
I don't know about y'all but, I need a blunt, a drink or a cigarette after just listing the typical day of a single mother. Where's your FREEDOM single moms? Mothers day and if your lucky fathers day!
What bothers me is that single mothers will do all the work, for years sometimes, then one day - out of nowhere - the "fathers" will just pop up like...Okay, tag me in! As if he called time out for a while to catch his breath or something but will expect you to still be in the game. My feeling towards that is, okay since you've tagged back in ( I say back in because, you were in the game to create the child ) do I now get a time out, a chance to relax and catch my breath! But no, sometimes that single mom winds up taking care of not only their baby/ babies but, that nigga too. Lets face it, we as mothers will always carry the weight of all that happens in their homes. The sad part about that is, they/ we will always be under-appreciated by the men who should be on their knees, bowing down to pucker up and do some major ass kissing.
So right now, in this moment of reading this post, I ask that all the strong, independent, single, queens of their castle, women/ mothers, do this one thing...Close your eyes, lift your heads up, take a deep breath, relax and just be in this moment. Thinking only, to yourselves, this...
" I will make it through these times of dark feelings about when my time will come. My time is now, I have been blessed with children who will always love, respect and appreciate me. They have my back at all times and they'll never forget all the wonderful - as well as not so wonderful times we've had and will have together. No one can take that away from me, even if they try."
Remember this, a man is nothing without a strong woman beside him and he left you, which means he will continue to be NOTHING and miss out on all the joys a child can bring. When you move on and y'all will...It'll be his lost completely, y'all are queens in your own right and a king shall come, until then...Take a bow ladies cause all hats are off for all you single mothers.
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