Miss independent, the mom who also wears the pants in the household! She who has no choice but to play daddy to her child or children, in most instances, is much like Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde.
On the phone one hand, this woman is nurturing, sensitive, the kisser of all those little boo-boos and the homemaker! On the other hand, this woman is the bread winner, the head of the household, he no-shit taker and the one who has to teach her son how to be a man, a better man then his sperm donner whose mastered the art of disappearing.
This lady has to be strong at heart because, any sign of weakness will give her child or children, the ammunition to gun her down and take over the thrown because as we all know, to be a woman means, to be a queen but what men fail to realize, is that when they relinquish their title as king, the queen now has double the power she already had in the first place and once a WOMAN has had a taste of complete power in her home, it's going to be hard for her to give that up.
Note to men: When y'all get women pregnant, you guys are the only ones who are capable if leaving the situation. If a woman were to leave, they'd be judged, hearing things such as, what kind of mother just leaves their child? Or what was she thinking? She must be crazy! But if a man leaves, people give all kinds of excuses like, maybe he wasn't ready! Or maybe he was scared! My question is, what kind of bullshit us that? I mean can a woman not be scared? Can she not be ready? So why isn't she justified in walking out but a man is!?
I, much like many of you readers, was raised by a single mother. She carried all of the weight and worked her ass off ( almost all of the time) trying to provide for us, us being me and my three siblings, the best way she knew how and we appreciated her for that. Showering her with double everything, especially love but we, as little girls, don't really appreciate our single mothers, until we become ones our selves and then, it's as if we see just how much our own mothers struggled.
Throughout your life of course there are struggles...Financial, mental and emotional but, that struggle is vastly doubled when you have a child. I wonder if a man has ever tried to consider our struggle and if so, did he just not give a damn because he was FREE!
Lets, for a minute, discuss the job description of a homemaker/ single mother...A typical week includes; waking up, getting the kids feed and bathed. Doing your daughters hair or going to get your sons hair cut. Sending them off to school - daycare or headstart, of course you'll have to wash your own ass and get yourself ready for the day. Then you'll head off to work - to make the money. At some point you'll have to go to the grocery store ( if you qualify for foodstamps, BONUS! ) If your job is working from home ( stay - at - home parent ) then you'll have to get your hustle on just to make/ get your money. Then it's time to clean house i.e, washing dishes and clothes, taking out the trash and cleaning that out, mowing the lawn on the weekend and damn if your car needs to be fixed. By the time you get a chance to sit down, its time to pick up the kids, do homework, start dinner, get the kids ready for school in the morning and yourself for the new day and then off to bed, only to get up and do it all over again, ALL BY YOURSELF.
I don't know about y'all but, I need a blunt, a drink or a cigarette after just listing the typical day of a single mother. Where's your FREEDOM single moms? Mothers day and if your lucky fathers day!
What bothers me is that single mothers will do all the work, for years sometimes, then one day - out of nowhere - the "fathers" will just pop up like...Okay, tag me in! As if he called time out for a while to catch his breath or something but will expect you to still be in the game. My feeling towards that is, okay since you've tagged back in ( I say back in because, you were in the game to create the child ) do I now get a time out, a chance to relax and catch my breath! But no, sometimes that single mom winds up taking care of not only their baby/ babies but, that nigga too. Lets face it, we as mothers will always carry the weight of all that happens in their homes. The sad part about that is, they/ we will always be under-appreciated by the men who should be on their knees, bowing down to pucker up and do some major ass kissing.
So right now, in this moment of reading this post, I ask that all the strong, independent, single, queens of their castle, women/ mothers, do this one thing...Close your eyes, lift your heads up, take a deep breath, relax and just be in this moment. Thinking only, to yourselves, this...
" I will make it through these times of dark feelings about when my time will come. My time is now, I have been blessed with children who will always love, respect and appreciate me. They have my back at all times and they'll never forget all the wonderful - as well as not so wonderful times we've had and will have together. No one can take that away from me, even if they try."
Remember this, a man is nothing without a strong woman beside him and he left you, which means he will continue to be NOTHING and miss out on all the joys a child can bring. When you move on and y'all will...It'll be his lost completely, y'all are queens in your own right and a king shall come, until then...Take a bow ladies cause all hats are off for all you single mothers.
Friday, January 30, 2015
Thursday, January 22, 2015
You Love Them Now Leave Them...Or Maybe Just Stay
Have you heard the expression, once a cheater, always a cheater? What about this statement, cheaters never change? If so you believed it didn't you? You've probably thought to yourselves, "I could never cheat on someone, or even stay with someone who's cheated on me!" Well guess what, everyone has had that same thought once or twice, until it happens...You cheat on your mate or your mate cheats on you.
The truth is, you can never really mean that statement because, you can't control two things, one being life and the other being your mate. When you're in a deeply committed relationship, things happen or they don't. What I mean by that is, people change, they tend to stop doing certain things their partner once was fond of or they start doing things their partner grows tried of.
Now, hold on a sec. I am in no way placing blame on which ever person did the cheating, what I am saying however, is that the art of cheating is much like the art of dancing or making a baby, it takes two! Which simply means the so called "victim" isn't really so innocent on their part. They don't really hold all the blame but they can't necessarily cry "wolf" either.
For a moment, lets focus on the cheater. Make no mistake about it, YOU ARE WRONG! But what was your reason for cheating in the first place? Did she/he not give you enough attention? Did he/she stop giving up the booty? Did you need someone to talk to and she/he didn't make the time to listen or support or acknowledge you? Were you board, so you sought out some man/woman to fulfill the element of surprise, as a way of keeping you on your toes, much like your mate once did when y'all first began dating?
Whatever the reason, something began to change in your relationship or maybe just in you so you went for what you thought was a quick fix, something to do to make your mate take notice and either reprimand you or throw in the towel all together. Now before I completely blow yawls mind with my theory on this tragic sometimes fatal end to many relationships, lets discuss the "victim" better known as the one who got cheated on. The reason I said you can't really cry "wolf" or place blame is because you've had to have done something, lets face it, men/women don't just cheat for no reason, unless their polygamist!
So what did you start or stop doing? Did you loose confidence in yourself or - in a womans' case - Did you loose confidence or gain way too much confidence about yourself? Did you start worrying about your needs only and stopped caring about his/hers? Did you become even more lazy (come on, everyone can be lazy) like some kind of couch potato? Did you change your mind about having children, knowing your mate desperately wanted them? Did you loose your attraction for your mate and stopped wanting to have sex with him/her? Did you work all the time, so ultimately that's all you began to care about? Did you mistakenly ask for a threesome, in hopes of spicing things up as way of fixing whatever was broken, in your relationship? If so that was like placing a band-aid on a cut, eventually the bandage gets wet and falls off! Did you want out but waited for your partner to throw in the towel, so you wouldn't have too? Whatever you did or didn't do, I'm sorry to say, might have played a part in why he/she cheated on you in the first place. So again you can't cry "wolf" cause, in my opinion, you knew something like this was coming! So forgive me if I don't but into the talk about you being a "VICTIM", hell for all I know, you could have been getting yourself a little booty on the side, while your mate was cheating.
Okay, ready for my mind blowing theory? Here it is...The reason men/women cheat, in my opinion, is because of the lack of COMMUNICATION!! There's a lot of things that can go missing in a relationship, before it completely falls apart, Trust, sex, and compassion. Then there's COMMUNICATION, respect and love. All these things tend to go in order, much like the stages of grief but once the communication dies, you have two options...Stay with them or leave them! If you decide to stay, be very clear that you're choosing to work - bust yo ass - to rebuild the lose of trust, sex and compassion. You will have to be vulnerable with your mate and COMMUNICATE with them about everything that went wrong between the two of you, what you want out of the relationship now and where to go from here - the next step. Understand, this process will be hard, very hard but worth it if you still love your mate. But should you choose to leave, don't wait until the love and respect is gone, especially if y'all have children, just put your big boy draws/big girl panties on and as I like to say, "CUT THE CORD." Be honest with him/her and tell them out right, the relationship isn't working for you anymore, otherwise you'd be playing a game that both of you will loose especially if there's still love between both or you. Lets be honest, if y'all were to stay together just for the sake of not wanting to be the first one to throw in the towel, would you really be cool with seeing the man/woman, you still love, with a different woman/man?
Now, I'm no expert, I could very well be wrong, I'm just speaking on behalf of things I know to be true but if that's not good enough for you readers...Well I don't know, I guess you'll have to experience cheating or being cheated on for yourself!
The truth is, you can never really mean that statement because, you can't control two things, one being life and the other being your mate. When you're in a deeply committed relationship, things happen or they don't. What I mean by that is, people change, they tend to stop doing certain things their partner once was fond of or they start doing things their partner grows tried of.
Now, hold on a sec. I am in no way placing blame on which ever person did the cheating, what I am saying however, is that the art of cheating is much like the art of dancing or making a baby, it takes two! Which simply means the so called "victim" isn't really so innocent on their part. They don't really hold all the blame but they can't necessarily cry "wolf" either.
For a moment, lets focus on the cheater. Make no mistake about it, YOU ARE WRONG! But what was your reason for cheating in the first place? Did she/he not give you enough attention? Did he/she stop giving up the booty? Did you need someone to talk to and she/he didn't make the time to listen or support or acknowledge you? Were you board, so you sought out some man/woman to fulfill the element of surprise, as a way of keeping you on your toes, much like your mate once did when y'all first began dating?
Whatever the reason, something began to change in your relationship or maybe just in you so you went for what you thought was a quick fix, something to do to make your mate take notice and either reprimand you or throw in the towel all together. Now before I completely blow yawls mind with my theory on this tragic sometimes fatal end to many relationships, lets discuss the "victim" better known as the one who got cheated on. The reason I said you can't really cry "wolf" or place blame is because you've had to have done something, lets face it, men/women don't just cheat for no reason, unless their polygamist!
So what did you start or stop doing? Did you loose confidence in yourself or - in a womans' case - Did you loose confidence or gain way too much confidence about yourself? Did you start worrying about your needs only and stopped caring about his/hers? Did you become even more lazy (come on, everyone can be lazy) like some kind of couch potato? Did you change your mind about having children, knowing your mate desperately wanted them? Did you loose your attraction for your mate and stopped wanting to have sex with him/her? Did you work all the time, so ultimately that's all you began to care about? Did you mistakenly ask for a threesome, in hopes of spicing things up as way of fixing whatever was broken, in your relationship? If so that was like placing a band-aid on a cut, eventually the bandage gets wet and falls off! Did you want out but waited for your partner to throw in the towel, so you wouldn't have too? Whatever you did or didn't do, I'm sorry to say, might have played a part in why he/she cheated on you in the first place. So again you can't cry "wolf" cause, in my opinion, you knew something like this was coming! So forgive me if I don't but into the talk about you being a "VICTIM", hell for all I know, you could have been getting yourself a little booty on the side, while your mate was cheating.
Okay, ready for my mind blowing theory? Here it is...The reason men/women cheat, in my opinion, is because of the lack of COMMUNICATION!! There's a lot of things that can go missing in a relationship, before it completely falls apart, Trust, sex, and compassion. Then there's COMMUNICATION, respect and love. All these things tend to go in order, much like the stages of grief but once the communication dies, you have two options...Stay with them or leave them! If you decide to stay, be very clear that you're choosing to work - bust yo ass - to rebuild the lose of trust, sex and compassion. You will have to be vulnerable with your mate and COMMUNICATE with them about everything that went wrong between the two of you, what you want out of the relationship now and where to go from here - the next step. Understand, this process will be hard, very hard but worth it if you still love your mate. But should you choose to leave, don't wait until the love and respect is gone, especially if y'all have children, just put your big boy draws/big girl panties on and as I like to say, "CUT THE CORD." Be honest with him/her and tell them out right, the relationship isn't working for you anymore, otherwise you'd be playing a game that both of you will loose especially if there's still love between both or you. Lets be honest, if y'all were to stay together just for the sake of not wanting to be the first one to throw in the towel, would you really be cool with seeing the man/woman, you still love, with a different woman/man?
Now, I'm no expert, I could very well be wrong, I'm just speaking on behalf of things I know to be true but if that's not good enough for you readers...Well I don't know, I guess you'll have to experience cheating or being cheated on for yourself!
Sex...M.I.A
Ah the teenage years, the years where if you are engaging in any sexual activities, it is the best activity in your life! It beats playing football, basketball, soccer, track/cross country running. It beats cheer-leading, dance, acting, and poetry, but don't get me wrong, theses activities are great to participate in, I like to think of them as...Foreplay! Something that will eventually lead to - getting it on, doing the "do," the "grown-up," or as Snoop would call it, sexual seduction. Which makes this activity awesome!!
Now before I go any deeper, pun intended! When you're young, parents are absolutely accurate in saying things such as, "Sex is not something for KIDS" or "Wait until you're old enough." They tell/warn you about sex before you have it because, while they already know you're thinking about it, they want you to THINK about it. Did you know, each time you have sex, you give that person (or people, no judgement) a part of you and the part you give is whatever your partner chooses to remember about yawls, very personal, very private encounter? The memory will never go away, weather it's very good or very - very bad, and I should know, (just take a look/ read at my old post entitled You People You). So if you do nothing else do these four things before you have sex;
Sex is like a bear in hibernation, it's as if you're lying dormant from birth to the age when you first loose your virginity and once you do, it's as if the only thing on your mind is, when can I do it again? I don't know or can't speak for on behalf of all women but I can speak for me...Sex is like a bowel of frosted flakes, it's GRRREAT! Especially if you or at the very least your partner knows what to do and how to do it. To quote Bruce Leroy, in one of my favorite movies, "The Last Dragon" you'll need someone who can, "SHOW YOU SOME MOVES!" At least until you - yourself get into the swing of things. Once you do though, get ready, cause you'll be in for the time of your life!
There's literally so many different positions to try and ways to be bent that your teenage years are really the best years to engage in sexual activities such as, the stand up sixty-nine, the downward facing dog ( that's not just a yoga pose people), some back seat, or if you're like me, front seat action! Everyone loves getting it from the back (not in the ass!), but if you're into that go for it! Getting and giving head isn't to bad either, especially getting! I mean really, who doesn't enjoy waking up to some tongue action in between the streets of right and left leg? Hell any action in between those "streets" is ridiculous in the am!
One of my reasons for liking sex at this stage is because of the sneaking, the fear of almost getting caught, in the bathroom, in the living-room, in the closet of your bedroom, shit pulling an R-Kelly and enjoying a little quickie in the kitchen ( on the table, over by the stove, or on the counter, by the buttered rolls). Anyone up for a little game of don't get caught outside also revered to as a quick game of hide and go get some, between you and your "lova man" or "lova girl." That thrill I get of can/did you see me ? Gets me going every time.
Love making is cool, when you find the love of your life but in my opinion, making love should be made when you really love or are in love with someone, not just love making with the one you're with...That's why that category is restricted, and the only one who has access to that area is my husband. But before I was married, I explored the area of fucking! Rough sex is in a word...Amazing. Having, in your mind, the unlimited use of come get some baby, take me - it's yours, tie me up, smack my ass, leave me a few "love" tags, as known as hickeys, pull my hair, bite me, slam me into the wall and have your way with me was amazing because, if you did get bruised, you could always blame it on whatever sport you were into.Yeah, the teenage years where there was a lot of action, especially on the weekends, when you'd be held up in your very own little piece of "sex heaven" with your boyfriend/girlfriend, fuck buddy or maybe lying about where you were going to be, in order to go sneak a quick session in over their house. Shit those were the days!
Then somewhere along the lines all that sex STOPS! Not because you've gotten board but because you've gotten busy, busy working, busy graduating and heading to college, busy having children and careers and through all that busy business, your sex life went from being very popular to very smokers and goths only. And then you're married and you're children require food, time, attention, doctor visits, oh and that house isn't going to clean its self! You'd be lucky to get a babysitter, just to get some alone time with your man (or woman) and when you do, you're tired or arguing about why y'all haven't had sex in a while, instead of actually having sex while y'all have the time to do so.
Conversations that once began with the sentence, "How do you want it?" Now begin with the sentence, "When do you want to?" Before you know or realize that sex has went ROGUE, it's been an entire month and you've only had sex maybe once but that time doesn't really count cause it was some finger or hand action and nobody came or maybe you did cum but were too upset, from the non-penetration to give a shit.
Then one day when you're watching Showtime movies and a sex scene pops up, you look at your man or woman and y'all realize y'all remember now whats missing in yawls relationship, marriage or partnership...The sex has been M.I.A! You both say, "DAMN" with your eyes and then quickly realize your next order of business, to get butt naked and have some Marvin Gay,"sexual healing" finally satisfying the urge of having sex, remembering the feeling of deep penetration in a cozy, wet, warm, place of pure goodness, wanting to keep yawls sex record on repeat, stopping only to smoke y'all a cigarette and take a cat nap in order to recoup for another round of good old fashioned SEX.
Now before I go any deeper, pun intended! When you're young, parents are absolutely accurate in saying things such as, "Sex is not something for KIDS" or "Wait until you're old enough." They tell/warn you about sex before you have it because, while they already know you're thinking about it, they want you to THINK about it. Did you know, each time you have sex, you give that person (or people, no judgement) a part of you and the part you give is whatever your partner chooses to remember about yawls, very personal, very private encounter? The memory will never go away, weather it's very good or very - very bad, and I should know, (just take a look/ read at my old post entitled You People You). So if you do nothing else do these four things before you have sex;
- Get birth control and have it, at all times, cause there is no such thing as, "Well I wasn't trying to get pregnant!"
- Know the person you want to have sex with because, he could be crazy, deranged, dumb as a box of rocks, gay (it happens, not to me, but hey you never know) or he/she could be related to you and that will fuck you up mentally.
- Wear a condom! Even if he says he's allergic! Hell he doesn't know your allergies, you could be allergic to pregnancy...the very thought about having a baby to soon, might make you break out in hives.
- Go get checked up - out - around even under, regularly, just in case you say he's clean or she says she is, you'll never know how clean if you don't take "YO" ass to the doctor!! Had to get ghetto for a sec.
Sex is like a bear in hibernation, it's as if you're lying dormant from birth to the age when you first loose your virginity and once you do, it's as if the only thing on your mind is, when can I do it again? I don't know or can't speak for on behalf of all women but I can speak for me...Sex is like a bowel of frosted flakes, it's GRRREAT! Especially if you or at the very least your partner knows what to do and how to do it. To quote Bruce Leroy, in one of my favorite movies, "The Last Dragon" you'll need someone who can, "SHOW YOU SOME MOVES!" At least until you - yourself get into the swing of things. Once you do though, get ready, cause you'll be in for the time of your life!
There's literally so many different positions to try and ways to be bent that your teenage years are really the best years to engage in sexual activities such as, the stand up sixty-nine, the downward facing dog ( that's not just a yoga pose people), some back seat, or if you're like me, front seat action! Everyone loves getting it from the back (not in the ass!), but if you're into that go for it! Getting and giving head isn't to bad either, especially getting! I mean really, who doesn't enjoy waking up to some tongue action in between the streets of right and left leg? Hell any action in between those "streets" is ridiculous in the am!
One of my reasons for liking sex at this stage is because of the sneaking, the fear of almost getting caught, in the bathroom, in the living-room, in the closet of your bedroom, shit pulling an R-Kelly and enjoying a little quickie in the kitchen ( on the table, over by the stove, or on the counter, by the buttered rolls). Anyone up for a little game of don't get caught outside also revered to as a quick game of hide and go get some, between you and your "lova man" or "lova girl." That thrill I get of can/did you see me ? Gets me going every time.
Love making is cool, when you find the love of your life but in my opinion, making love should be made when you really love or are in love with someone, not just love making with the one you're with...That's why that category is restricted, and the only one who has access to that area is my husband. But before I was married, I explored the area of fucking! Rough sex is in a word...Amazing. Having, in your mind, the unlimited use of come get some baby, take me - it's yours, tie me up, smack my ass, leave me a few "love" tags, as known as hickeys, pull my hair, bite me, slam me into the wall and have your way with me was amazing because, if you did get bruised, you could always blame it on whatever sport you were into.Yeah, the teenage years where there was a lot of action, especially on the weekends, when you'd be held up in your very own little piece of "sex heaven" with your boyfriend/girlfriend, fuck buddy or maybe lying about where you were going to be, in order to go sneak a quick session in over their house. Shit those were the days!
Then somewhere along the lines all that sex STOPS! Not because you've gotten board but because you've gotten busy, busy working, busy graduating and heading to college, busy having children and careers and through all that busy business, your sex life went from being very popular to very smokers and goths only. And then you're married and you're children require food, time, attention, doctor visits, oh and that house isn't going to clean its self! You'd be lucky to get a babysitter, just to get some alone time with your man (or woman) and when you do, you're tired or arguing about why y'all haven't had sex in a while, instead of actually having sex while y'all have the time to do so.
Conversations that once began with the sentence, "How do you want it?" Now begin with the sentence, "When do you want to?" Before you know or realize that sex has went ROGUE, it's been an entire month and you've only had sex maybe once but that time doesn't really count cause it was some finger or hand action and nobody came or maybe you did cum but were too upset, from the non-penetration to give a shit.
Then one day when you're watching Showtime movies and a sex scene pops up, you look at your man or woman and y'all realize y'all remember now whats missing in yawls relationship, marriage or partnership...The sex has been M.I.A! You both say, "DAMN" with your eyes and then quickly realize your next order of business, to get butt naked and have some Marvin Gay,"sexual healing" finally satisfying the urge of having sex, remembering the feeling of deep penetration in a cozy, wet, warm, place of pure goodness, wanting to keep yawls sex record on repeat, stopping only to smoke y'all a cigarette and take a cat nap in order to recoup for another round of good old fashioned SEX.
Friday, January 16, 2015
...Kids
First off let me just start by saying children are a blessing from God and I am so greatfull to have been blessed with four of my own. That being said, kids are weird, crazy, wonderful, sometimes defiant/ bad little "adults," who crack the hell out of me! The shit they say and do is so ridiculous...Take for instance my four, I'll start with the most recent child of mine Breaija.
Breaija or as I like to call her my baby suga mama! She likes to try and be a big girl, she'll be sitting down somewhere and will damn near break her neck trying to sit all the way up - the struggle is real in the that one because she really wants to not only sit up like she's able to do so but she will try to pull on her shirt to get out of her swing, her car seat, even her bed! She's mastered the art of yelling now too, so when she's lonely, she talks to herself (quietly at first), then she yelaks - yell talks - probably thinking to herself the whole time, "I know somebody hears me!" Then she'll wanna talk at the wrong time...I breastfeed, so while she has the boob, in her mouth, this chick will start engaging in conversation with me all to, two seconds later, get mad at me. Not because I'm not talking to her but because she is no longer getting any boob milk!
Which brings me to diaper changing time or as Breaija would lie to make it, peek-a-boo! Her little game of legs down, legs up, where she will literally get her laugh on as her dad attempts to change her butt...He'll go to unstrap the diaper - legs down, then he'll attempt to pull the diaper down to wipe her butt - legs up and that will go on for the entire three minutes it takes to change her butt, all the while she is smiling and laughing at him. Don't let her yawn because within that moment Barack Obama has just sent the troops to war and they lost. She flips out! I guess it's because of all the wind that she swallows or something and then she'll have the nerve to look at us like, "How dare you make me yawn!" Or my baby suga will fight herself and if not herself, then she'll fight her stuffed bear. little boo-boo and when we go to check on her she'll have little boo-boo in a chock hold with the covers pulled over both their heads, can you say DANGEROUS? Better yet CRAZY! But you gotta love that girl, especially when she smiles at you, looking like some little baby doll.
Next there's Alijah a.k.a fat dude, a.k.a little A.R and here lately we've been addressing him as "girly dude!" This little boy is so smart - so smart that it's funny just listening and watching him. He will mimic everything, the first time he mimicked me cursing, it blew my mind, cause it came from outta nowhere. I do this thing where I start singing the clean up song, "clean up, clean up, everybody clean up," well this time I decided to say, "everybody clean the fuck up," at the end of the song and Alijah, who was only one at the time, repeated me and it started out so cute...Then out of nowhere this dude says, "bean the fuck up!" Mind you back then bean was how he said clean but when he said, "bean the fuck up," It came out all demonic and weird that I just couldn't stop laughing. All the while he was looking at me like, yay I just did something good, that made mom laugh and his dad was looking at him like no! What? Where did that come from?
The first time he used the big toilet was so funny because, this little boy would act as if the toilet was going to come alive and eat him. He was good when we sat him on it but as soon as we let go...This dude went from smiling, with security and comfort, to stop the presses, hold up - wait a minute, what happen to your hands? His eyes got so big and then he began to panic, probably thinking, "Oh my Lord, their feeding me to this thing, what do I do? How do I get off?" Next thing I know, this little boy starts trying to get up and ends up falling in! Can you say Terrified? He started screaming and looking around for help as if he was two seconds away from the end of his life. When I got him out, he was shacking, his booty was dripping wet and he had this look about that said, "Where the hell have you been mom? I almost did't make it!" From then on, whenever we'd put him on the toilet, he screamed murder, murder she wrote.
We call him fat dude cause this little n-word, can eat! I would fix him his plate and I swear you would hear a countdown in his head...3.2.1 attack! And he would. One night, I made spaghetti and then gave him a piece of bread and a cup of milk. This guy fucked up that spaghetti so tough, that when it was gone he must have licked the bowl to get all the excess sauce, swallowed that piece of bread and I honestly think that milk evaporated! That's how fast he drank it. When he was finished, he busted up in my room, spaghetti sauce all on his forehead, spaghetti noodles, with bits of meat on them, hanging off his chin, bread crumbs on his fingers, which were covered in spaghetti sauce too and a milk mustache, talking bout, "I'm done eating my food mom!" My only thought was...Well, at least I know he likes spaghetti!
He loves his sisters but he's not one to let them bully him. My five year old Jhayanna would always mess with him when they'd play, she would snatch shit from him and push him off the bed and tell him no whenever he'd go to do something. I guess he had been keeping track to all the shit she would do to him cause, one day she went to grab his blocks from him and all we heard was, "NO!" In this little baby voice, a loud knock, followed by a, "Ouch lijah, don't hit me with that - that hurt." I ran up, to see what happen and Jhayanna was holding her forehead telling me Alijah had just hit her in the head, with his block. Of course Alijah got yelled at for hitting on her because, she is a girl and boys don't hit girls, which crushed his little spirit but I told Jhayanna, that's what she gets for fucking with him...He was getting older and he was going to start returning the favor of being mean.
He is now in this girly stage of his life, where he wants to either cry about everything, say okay all the damn time, say yes for and to every damn thing or say some crap about he's not or as he would say, "I'm not!" Now, him saying yes to everything or I'm not, isn't so bad because, well...Who cares? For example, we'll say, "Alijah, do you wanna eat some boo-boo?" Just playing with him and he'll say yes mom-dad or I'm not and then look all evil or his version of evil cause, he's handsome as all get out. But that crying b.s and that okay shit, is why he's earned the name "girly dude." This girly n-word will start crying cause he has to use the bathroom, which is crazy, seeing as how he is now fully potty trained and isn't afraid of the toilet anymore. He cries cause he doesn't want to be alone or cause his dad plays with him or cause he doesn't want to ride in the stroller or cause he doesn't wanna walk or cause he'll see me making his food and isn't able to get it yet because it's hot...He just cries! And Lord forbid we say anything to him when he's in the crying mood cause then he'll be in the screaming and making weird ass faces mood or he'll hit us with an okay. But this okay is the girly-est okay you've ever heard from a boy, it lingers...For example, we'll tell him to do something like put his pajamas on and he'll move slow as hell, put his thumb in his mouth and then stare at us, like he forgot what we just told him to do, then when we repeat the direction to him, he'll say, "Ohh-kaayy!! What the hell is that? I mean, this dude sounds like the nigga from school dance...Ohh-kaayy! But you gotta love him.
Then there's Jhayanna, whose in a class all by herself and she gets there riding a short bus with two seats, the drivers seat and hers. Can you say mood disorder? This little five year, fifty year old cries at everything and she's the biggest bully, in the house, at school and outside. This girl starts her day off crying, she wakes up and it's sunny - she cries, it's raining - she cries, she's sad - she cries, she's happy - she cries, she farts - she cries, we ask her how school was today or what's wrong, hell we ask he any damn thing and wait for it....SHE CRIES!
She's the one that, to ask her a question of any kind, is like waiting on the return of Jesus, cause that's how long it'll take her to answer. One day we asked her what her problem was because, she was being so mean to everybody and for about thirty minutes she stood there making this weird ass noise, "a-a-a, because - be-be-be- cause"...When she finally answered me I promise you, I had cleaned up the entire kitchen and started dinner all for her to say, "Y'all don't treat me like an adult!" My first thought was, bitch you're not an adult! But of course you can't say that to a child, instead I said, "Because you're not an adult!" Only after laughing at her. I then said, "I'll treat you like an adult but first I need to make sure you meet the criteria...Do you have a job, that we don't know about? Can you cook or wash clothes or go to the Walmart to get the groceries for this month? No! Okay, well can you at least find your own clothes everyday, wash your butt, without me or your dad telling you to? Can you do your own hair or at least have the funds to go get it done? Can you wash the dishes, change Breaijas' diaper or brush your teeth, without someone telling you to do so? No! Well halla at me when you can okay and then we'll talk, you know what she did then? CRIED!! That girl is something else, as a matter of fact, I'm going to move on cause, in the words of my husband, "You can write a horror novel, when it comes to her"...Stay Tuned!
Moving on to Imonne (Imani), this girl can be so blank at times, sort of like a dial tone or when someone dies at the hospital and they flat line - that's what she puts us through at homework time. Other times, she can't help but be weird or make weird faces...One day I watched this girl run to the chair but before she sat down, she broke out in some robotic, stiff neck movement like she had to auto program sitting down, then when she took her seat and realized I had be watching her, she quickly said, "what?" With this big ol' smile on her face, showing nothing but gums cause she grinds her teeth so much, that she literally has to open wide, just for you to notice she actually has teeth in there.
She is so energetic too, our very own energizer bunny, that one. Actually, the next time I have some almost dead batteries, I think I'll give them to her and have her rub them together while doing her favorite activity...running! That girl can go. One day she literally woke up and ran around the house for everything, it didn't matter if she was using the bathroom - her legs would be moving while sitting down on the toilet. If she was cleaning her room - she'd run, Imonne can't even sit still long enough to watch t.v.
She's so nosy too, she has to know everything your doing before, during and after you do it, so to watch a new movie with her is so annoying cause she'll ask all those questions about the characters in there. Then if we tell her to be quite, her face drops to her toe nails and...flat line! Like we took her heart out of her chest cavity, did the heel-toe on it and then blew it up! Her feelings would be hurt for all of two seconds until, you've guessed it, she's back up bopping around.
Yeah she's a weird one too. The weekends are like a game show in her mind cause she doesn't play twenty-one questions, it's more like forty-eight. She'll have a new question every minute of the entire day...Her favorite question is, "Do we have school in the morning?" She will ask that question like Nelly, over and over again, even if their own break! It all starts on the last day of the school week, as soon as her dad picks her up, "Dad, do we have school in the morning?" As if she didn't already know that it was Friday, so the answer was no.
But over all, through all the weird craziness, those kids are all kinds of caring and compassionate. They can be bad but each one of them have qualities that couldn't be bought, just taught over time and honestly I wouldn't trade them for the world. Having them is like having my own special deluxe pizza and I love everything about them.
Breaija or as I like to call her my baby suga mama! She likes to try and be a big girl, she'll be sitting down somewhere and will damn near break her neck trying to sit all the way up - the struggle is real in the that one because she really wants to not only sit up like she's able to do so but she will try to pull on her shirt to get out of her swing, her car seat, even her bed! She's mastered the art of yelling now too, so when she's lonely, she talks to herself (quietly at first), then she yelaks - yell talks - probably thinking to herself the whole time, "I know somebody hears me!" Then she'll wanna talk at the wrong time...I breastfeed, so while she has the boob, in her mouth, this chick will start engaging in conversation with me all to, two seconds later, get mad at me. Not because I'm not talking to her but because she is no longer getting any boob milk!
Which brings me to diaper changing time or as Breaija would lie to make it, peek-a-boo! Her little game of legs down, legs up, where she will literally get her laugh on as her dad attempts to change her butt...He'll go to unstrap the diaper - legs down, then he'll attempt to pull the diaper down to wipe her butt - legs up and that will go on for the entire three minutes it takes to change her butt, all the while she is smiling and laughing at him. Don't let her yawn because within that moment Barack Obama has just sent the troops to war and they lost. She flips out! I guess it's because of all the wind that she swallows or something and then she'll have the nerve to look at us like, "How dare you make me yawn!" Or my baby suga will fight herself and if not herself, then she'll fight her stuffed bear. little boo-boo and when we go to check on her she'll have little boo-boo in a chock hold with the covers pulled over both their heads, can you say DANGEROUS? Better yet CRAZY! But you gotta love that girl, especially when she smiles at you, looking like some little baby doll.
Next there's Alijah a.k.a fat dude, a.k.a little A.R and here lately we've been addressing him as "girly dude!" This little boy is so smart - so smart that it's funny just listening and watching him. He will mimic everything, the first time he mimicked me cursing, it blew my mind, cause it came from outta nowhere. I do this thing where I start singing the clean up song, "clean up, clean up, everybody clean up," well this time I decided to say, "everybody clean the fuck up," at the end of the song and Alijah, who was only one at the time, repeated me and it started out so cute...Then out of nowhere this dude says, "bean the fuck up!" Mind you back then bean was how he said clean but when he said, "bean the fuck up," It came out all demonic and weird that I just couldn't stop laughing. All the while he was looking at me like, yay I just did something good, that made mom laugh and his dad was looking at him like no! What? Where did that come from?
The first time he used the big toilet was so funny because, this little boy would act as if the toilet was going to come alive and eat him. He was good when we sat him on it but as soon as we let go...This dude went from smiling, with security and comfort, to stop the presses, hold up - wait a minute, what happen to your hands? His eyes got so big and then he began to panic, probably thinking, "Oh my Lord, their feeding me to this thing, what do I do? How do I get off?" Next thing I know, this little boy starts trying to get up and ends up falling in! Can you say Terrified? He started screaming and looking around for help as if he was two seconds away from the end of his life. When I got him out, he was shacking, his booty was dripping wet and he had this look about that said, "Where the hell have you been mom? I almost did't make it!" From then on, whenever we'd put him on the toilet, he screamed murder, murder she wrote.
We call him fat dude cause this little n-word, can eat! I would fix him his plate and I swear you would hear a countdown in his head...3.2.1 attack! And he would. One night, I made spaghetti and then gave him a piece of bread and a cup of milk. This guy fucked up that spaghetti so tough, that when it was gone he must have licked the bowl to get all the excess sauce, swallowed that piece of bread and I honestly think that milk evaporated! That's how fast he drank it. When he was finished, he busted up in my room, spaghetti sauce all on his forehead, spaghetti noodles, with bits of meat on them, hanging off his chin, bread crumbs on his fingers, which were covered in spaghetti sauce too and a milk mustache, talking bout, "I'm done eating my food mom!" My only thought was...Well, at least I know he likes spaghetti!
He loves his sisters but he's not one to let them bully him. My five year old Jhayanna would always mess with him when they'd play, she would snatch shit from him and push him off the bed and tell him no whenever he'd go to do something. I guess he had been keeping track to all the shit she would do to him cause, one day she went to grab his blocks from him and all we heard was, "NO!" In this little baby voice, a loud knock, followed by a, "Ouch lijah, don't hit me with that - that hurt." I ran up, to see what happen and Jhayanna was holding her forehead telling me Alijah had just hit her in the head, with his block. Of course Alijah got yelled at for hitting on her because, she is a girl and boys don't hit girls, which crushed his little spirit but I told Jhayanna, that's what she gets for fucking with him...He was getting older and he was going to start returning the favor of being mean.
He is now in this girly stage of his life, where he wants to either cry about everything, say okay all the damn time, say yes for and to every damn thing or say some crap about he's not or as he would say, "I'm not!" Now, him saying yes to everything or I'm not, isn't so bad because, well...Who cares? For example, we'll say, "Alijah, do you wanna eat some boo-boo?" Just playing with him and he'll say yes mom-dad or I'm not and then look all evil or his version of evil cause, he's handsome as all get out. But that crying b.s and that okay shit, is why he's earned the name "girly dude." This girly n-word will start crying cause he has to use the bathroom, which is crazy, seeing as how he is now fully potty trained and isn't afraid of the toilet anymore. He cries cause he doesn't want to be alone or cause his dad plays with him or cause he doesn't want to ride in the stroller or cause he doesn't wanna walk or cause he'll see me making his food and isn't able to get it yet because it's hot...He just cries! And Lord forbid we say anything to him when he's in the crying mood cause then he'll be in the screaming and making weird ass faces mood or he'll hit us with an okay. But this okay is the girly-est okay you've ever heard from a boy, it lingers...For example, we'll tell him to do something like put his pajamas on and he'll move slow as hell, put his thumb in his mouth and then stare at us, like he forgot what we just told him to do, then when we repeat the direction to him, he'll say, "Ohh-kaayy!! What the hell is that? I mean, this dude sounds like the nigga from school dance...Ohh-kaayy! But you gotta love him.
Then there's Jhayanna, whose in a class all by herself and she gets there riding a short bus with two seats, the drivers seat and hers. Can you say mood disorder? This little five year, fifty year old cries at everything and she's the biggest bully, in the house, at school and outside. This girl starts her day off crying, she wakes up and it's sunny - she cries, it's raining - she cries, she's sad - she cries, she's happy - she cries, she farts - she cries, we ask her how school was today or what's wrong, hell we ask he any damn thing and wait for it....SHE CRIES!
Moving on to Imonne (Imani), this girl can be so blank at times, sort of like a dial tone or when someone dies at the hospital and they flat line - that's what she puts us through at homework time. Other times, she can't help but be weird or make weird faces...One day I watched this girl run to the chair but before she sat down, she broke out in some robotic, stiff neck movement like she had to auto program sitting down, then when she took her seat and realized I had be watching her, she quickly said, "what?" With this big ol' smile on her face, showing nothing but gums cause she grinds her teeth so much, that she literally has to open wide, just for you to notice she actually has teeth in there.
She is so energetic too, our very own energizer bunny, that one. Actually, the next time I have some almost dead batteries, I think I'll give them to her and have her rub them together while doing her favorite activity...running! That girl can go. One day she literally woke up and ran around the house for everything, it didn't matter if she was using the bathroom - her legs would be moving while sitting down on the toilet. If she was cleaning her room - she'd run, Imonne can't even sit still long enough to watch t.v.
She's so nosy too, she has to know everything your doing before, during and after you do it, so to watch a new movie with her is so annoying cause she'll ask all those questions about the characters in there. Then if we tell her to be quite, her face drops to her toe nails and...flat line! Like we took her heart out of her chest cavity, did the heel-toe on it and then blew it up! Her feelings would be hurt for all of two seconds until, you've guessed it, she's back up bopping around.
Yeah she's a weird one too. The weekends are like a game show in her mind cause she doesn't play twenty-one questions, it's more like forty-eight. She'll have a new question every minute of the entire day...Her favorite question is, "Do we have school in the morning?" She will ask that question like Nelly, over and over again, even if their own break! It all starts on the last day of the school week, as soon as her dad picks her up, "Dad, do we have school in the morning?" As if she didn't already know that it was Friday, so the answer was no.
But over all, through all the weird craziness, those kids are all kinds of caring and compassionate. They can be bad but each one of them have qualities that couldn't be bought, just taught over time and honestly I wouldn't trade them for the world. Having them is like having my own special deluxe pizza and I love everything about them. Monday, January 12, 2015
Untitled Love Story
Its dark but not so dark that I can not see light of day but dark enough to make me drift into a deep sleep.
It's warm but not so warm that I will sweat from a sea of heat but enough to make me comfortable and safe.
I'm alone but not so alone that I am lonely but enough to allow me time to think.
I've cried in silence but somehow I know I've been heard.
My head is full but I'm not sure of what yet, It might be knowledge but if so, why do I feel as ignorant as the moon?
My eyes are wide open but some how slammed shut with a feeling of being sewed closed in the mist of me still trying to see.
My ears pick up the sound of a stranger but he is indistant of me although it sounds as though he maybe getting closer.
I'm yelling in a room that should echo but instead there is no sound.
My arms are running steal as though movement has escaped me, while my legs are as rapid as ever but haven't made it to their destination.
My bones have gone numb but still solid enough to be hard as rocks, though tough as armor.
I've swam deep, long and far in my blood and yet somehow I don't believe I'm in my own body anymore, I feel as though I've traveled to your and am now sinking in your heart.
I'm drowning in a tube now, full of shallow trust.
I'm paralyzed from all the the love I get from you, It's almost as if that was your plan all along.
Our eyes melted with so much passion at our first introduction, that we would have done anything for one another or I for you.
That place called misery, I've met you there on so many timeless occasions though we've not occupied this space for a while since.
Longing for you to notice my vulnerable, sensitive side and let loose with me.
Needing you to dive in with both feet and maybe two arms already.
Please! Close thyn eyes and see what you've done to me.
Close thyn mouth and utter the words - adore.
I'm standing here floating, watching you lie on your knees, bleeding the truth from your chest to which I had to stab you to obtain.
Feel me with your senses and I'll let your words taste me in truth.
Then we'll dance on a vanished stage together, see life together finally with four eyes open.
Live together as if we're our very own Bonnie and Romeo.
Lets sink together in this river of darkness we've created letting stars be our light as we take pictures of our prayers of a longevity life together as one.
It's warm but not so warm that I will sweat from a sea of heat but enough to make me comfortable and safe.
I'm alone but not so alone that I am lonely but enough to allow me time to think.
I've cried in silence but somehow I know I've been heard.
My head is full but I'm not sure of what yet, It might be knowledge but if so, why do I feel as ignorant as the moon?
My eyes are wide open but some how slammed shut with a feeling of being sewed closed in the mist of me still trying to see.
My ears pick up the sound of a stranger but he is indistant of me although it sounds as though he maybe getting closer.
I'm yelling in a room that should echo but instead there is no sound.
My arms are running steal as though movement has escaped me, while my legs are as rapid as ever but haven't made it to their destination.
My bones have gone numb but still solid enough to be hard as rocks, though tough as armor.
I've swam deep, long and far in my blood and yet somehow I don't believe I'm in my own body anymore, I feel as though I've traveled to your and am now sinking in your heart.
I'm drowning in a tube now, full of shallow trust.
I'm paralyzed from all the the love I get from you, It's almost as if that was your plan all along.
Our eyes melted with so much passion at our first introduction, that we would have done anything for one another or I for you.
That place called misery, I've met you there on so many timeless occasions though we've not occupied this space for a while since.
Longing for you to notice my vulnerable, sensitive side and let loose with me.
Needing you to dive in with both feet and maybe two arms already.
Please! Close thyn eyes and see what you've done to me.
Close thyn mouth and utter the words - adore.
I'm standing here floating, watching you lie on your knees, bleeding the truth from your chest to which I had to stab you to obtain.
Feel me with your senses and I'll let your words taste me in truth.
Then we'll dance on a vanished stage together, see life together finally with four eyes open.
Live together as if we're our very own Bonnie and Romeo.
Lets sink together in this river of darkness we've created letting stars be our light as we take pictures of our prayers of a longevity life together as one.
Childhood Before Time
Micheal Jackson said it best, do you remember the time? It starts with being born into this small, innocent, somewhat foreign little creature, that no-one can keep their hands off of. Then somewhere between the ages thirteen and sixteen, it happens, we as children start yearning to become an adult. Why? For the ability to do what we want! Say what we want! Have what we want and for some...To be on our own! What's not explained, rather what goes unheard to those who really want this ability, is that becoming an adult is not without strings attached! You'll have to get a job - work for the right to do, say, have, and be on your own. Okay, I'll be the first to say it, that part is the strings, it's also the hard part and among other things it's the part that SUCKS because, after you get the job, which you'll have to bust your ass to get! You're tired - to tired to do all that shit you wanted to do once you got to this stage in your life. If you add your own child or children into the equation, you'll be between the ages thirty-five and forty-five before you get a chance to really be an adult, with all the perks! Of course this part isn't intended for those of you without children! So lets, for a moment, go back - back to the days where you had nap time and the only job you had was those dumb ass chores, homework and to go outside to play. Everyone has heard their guardian, of some sort, say this, "Go outside and don;t come back until the street lights come on." On a school night, that was our time to catch up and recap the school day we had just endured with our friends over a game of curb ball, double dutch, tag/ hide and seek or hand games...Y'all remember this train goes, Miss Marry Mack, and shame shame shame! In the summer though, "don't come back til the street lights come on,"was code for...It's about to go down! We woke up at the butt crack, to get the day started. Broke out the bikes, the swim suits, water guns or balloons and you made sure you called all your friends to meet up with you at "the spot" (the play ground), only after asking somebody for some money to be able to attack the store or the ice cream truck when it jiggled down the block! The outside was our club/bar scene back then and even when those street lights cut on, as long as you were home on time, we had porch nights! listening to the radio, talking to your cousins, siblings or whoever was over your house. Riffin' on one another, trying to rap/sing and being just a little too loud, so you could let your mom, dad, whoever, know just how much fun you were having outside while trying to cuss on the low, over some, little kid - childish b.s hoping no one inside heard you and no one outside got mad enough to yell, "AWE!" triggering a reaction from the parents that would make everyone have to come in. Yeah summer was the time to let your hair down or put your weave in and take trips to...WYANDOTTELAKE! Y'all remember the wave pool and cunnoci creek! Getting pissed cause there were times you thought you were going, only to find out you'll have to wait til next year. Which brings me back to the now, when you've finally got what you want, your an adult but you pretty much have to schedule time to kick it with your friends and family. Looking at your kids enjoy their "street light" days and "porch night" nights, listening to them have conversations with their friends about being grown cause mom and dad is getting on their nerves, never letting them do things they want to do. Complaining about them having to clean their room, do homework and the entire time your watching them you're laughing on the inside, while thinking, "I remember that." Sitting them down trying to explain to them the joy of being a child, asking them to stay in a child's place, just as your -parents did to you and then you, for a split second stop and say to yourself, "where did the time go?" The truth is we rushed our time, longing for something that would happen eventually, hoping to get to the place your at right now and for what? Oh yeah I remember...That wonderful capability to do and say what you want while having your own without having to ask for any ones permission but your own and that makes being an adult worth it!
Final Words To Dontae
I guess it's time to lay you to rest, just put it to bed
I guess you wound up creating your own pool huh?
To which you continuously poured your sorrows into
With so many cries out, you would've had to shed many tears huh dude!
I guess you ended up taking a dive in it huh?
To which all the luggage you were carrying finally out weighed you dude
I guess we didn't realize how much you were suffering
Or how it over powered you dude
I guess the question you had on your mind was...where did we go?
The family you had just vanished on you dude
I guess it's pointless now, to wonder about the what ifs huh?
I guess if you had done that you wouldn't be missed!
I guess just caring for you now has made us all a bit crazy, to say the least
The sad thing is that, had we'd known what you'd eventually do...
I don't think the outcome for many of us would be any different dude!
I guess it's just like Wayne said, " whats misunderstood doesn't have to be explained."
This family has been beaten down cous'
I guess you noticed that huh?
It's sad for you to have come to this realization cous'
I guess you couldn't face it or maybe just couldn't handle it anymore
It's sad to not have a chance to see you dude
To talk to you!
To listen to you!
You were always missed by many and continuously loved by most cous'
I guess you got tired of waiting for our mimes to actually speak and say the words to you huh?
Yeah that happens sometimes
So I guess I don't really blame you dude
It's sad to not have had super powers to have heard you cous'
I wish there had been more time to tell you face to face what you needed to hear
We all love you Tae and we wish you were here!
I guess it's really time for us to lay you to rest now, just put you to bed...
What's done is done and all that needed to be said, has been said!
I guess you wound up creating your own pool huh?
To which you continuously poured your sorrows into
With so many cries out, you would've had to shed many tears huh dude!
I guess you ended up taking a dive in it huh?
To which all the luggage you were carrying finally out weighed you dude
I guess we didn't realize how much you were suffering
Or how it over powered you dude
I guess the question you had on your mind was...where did we go?
The family you had just vanished on you dude
I guess it's pointless now, to wonder about the what ifs huh?
I guess if you had done that you wouldn't be missed!
I guess just caring for you now has made us all a bit crazy, to say the least
The sad thing is that, had we'd known what you'd eventually do...
I don't think the outcome for many of us would be any different dude!
I guess it's just like Wayne said, " whats misunderstood doesn't have to be explained."
This family has been beaten down cous'
I guess you noticed that huh?
It's sad for you to have come to this realization cous'
I guess you couldn't face it or maybe just couldn't handle it anymore
It's sad to not have a chance to see you dude
To talk to you!
To listen to you!
You were always missed by many and continuously loved by most cous'
I guess you got tired of waiting for our mimes to actually speak and say the words to you huh?
Yeah that happens sometimes
So I guess I don't really blame you dude
It's sad to not have had super powers to have heard you cous'
I wish there had been more time to tell you face to face what you needed to hear
We all love you Tae and we wish you were here!
I guess it's really time for us to lay you to rest now, just put you to bed...
What's done is done and all that needed to be said, has been said!
Friday, January 9, 2015
They Live As They Come
They come while your waiting to dream and bound you in their arms in hopes of protecting you through the night
They live to slither around you as you lye dormant through the night
They come to relieve pain, stress and panic throughout your day
They live to toast your fears as they trickle down your face
They come to guard your spiritual being while you rest your physical body
They live to party while you suffer from mental, spiritual and physical pain
They come to extend a chalice to those whose cup has run over
They live to keep shackles on the ones who've stepped into the bad side
They come to dance on the sun to protect the heavenly gates
Their decrepit bodies live to dance, with excitement, at the death of our departed loved ones
They come while you morn to place a gentile kiss on your cheek and a quite whisper in your ear
They live for the serenade of your sorrowful screams
They come to place halos on the ones who've lived a life of fellowship
They live in anticipation in hopes of feeding off your inevitable demise
They will come to complete the destruction of you when they think you are beaten and broken down, the demons will always come for you!
They will always live to uplift and create a better you when you feel as though all is lost and you can't go on, the angels will always live for you!
They live to slither around you as you lye dormant through the night
They come to relieve pain, stress and panic throughout your day
They live to toast your fears as they trickle down your face
They come to guard your spiritual being while you rest your physical body
They live to party while you suffer from mental, spiritual and physical pain
They come to extend a chalice to those whose cup has run over
They live to keep shackles on the ones who've stepped into the bad side
They come to dance on the sun to protect the heavenly gates
Their decrepit bodies live to dance, with excitement, at the death of our departed loved ones
They come while you morn to place a gentile kiss on your cheek and a quite whisper in your ear
They live for the serenade of your sorrowful screams
They come to place halos on the ones who've lived a life of fellowship
They live in anticipation in hopes of feeding off your inevitable demise
They will come to complete the destruction of you when they think you are beaten and broken down, the demons will always come for you!
They will always live to uplift and create a better you when you feel as though all is lost and you can't go on, the angels will always live for you!
She Is...
She Is...
Ambitious, artistic, annoying but only towards loved ones and apologetic, when necessary.
Bipolar on occasion! Brave, when she has to be, beautiful, bold, bossy and black.
Emotional, when she cares for you, empathetic towards everyone, enthusiastic, energetic, when motivated and easy-going when she is relaxed.
Happy, honorable, honest, hot-headed, for good reason and can be a hard-ass, if for no other reason but to make you tough!
Interesting, imaginative, intelligent and quit intuitive.
Kind-hearted and has a kindred spirit to her friends.
Naughty, when it matters, neat and nurturing to her family.
Outstanding, always observant and sometimes old-school.
Radiant, in the eyes of her husband, respectful of others, responsible, real, rugite and a bit reluctant at times.
Seductive, when the mood is right! Sweet, sympathetic to peoples problems, sincere, spiritual, soulful and very strong.
Trustworthy, talented, thoughtful and talkative, more so when she gets intoxicated!
Youthful through it all because while she maybe; Annoying, Bipolar, Emotional, Hot-headed, Kind-hearted, Naughty, Observant, Real, Strong, Talkative and have and old soul...These are only words, they don't define her! She is just a person, with a big heart, in a young body, who knows exactly where she is going and acts her age while still never loosing sight of who?
Ambitious, artistic, annoying but only towards loved ones and apologetic, when necessary.
Bipolar on occasion! Brave, when she has to be, beautiful, bold, bossy and black.
Emotional, when she cares for you, empathetic towards everyone, enthusiastic, energetic, when motivated and easy-going when she is relaxed.
Happy, honorable, honest, hot-headed, for good reason and can be a hard-ass, if for no other reason but to make you tough!
Interesting, imaginative, intelligent and quit intuitive.
Kind-hearted and has a kindred spirit to her friends.
Naughty, when it matters, neat and nurturing to her family.
Outstanding, always observant and sometimes old-school.
Radiant, in the eyes of her husband, respectful of others, responsible, real, rugite and a bit reluctant at times.
Seductive, when the mood is right! Sweet, sympathetic to peoples problems, sincere, spiritual, soulful and very strong.
Trustworthy, talented, thoughtful and talkative, more so when she gets intoxicated!
Youthful through it all because while she maybe; Annoying, Bipolar, Emotional, Hot-headed, Kind-hearted, Naughty, Observant, Real, Strong, Talkative and have and old soul...These are only words, they don't define her! She is just a person, with a big heart, in a young body, who knows exactly where she is going and acts her age while still never loosing sight of who?
SHE IS...
Brittany - Shontae - Brooks
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